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I wanted to regain control and get my confidence back, and I learned to live and let go!

Illustration of a skydiving woman with a big smile on her face
I wanted to regain control and get my confidence back, and I learned to live and let go!

Teri was recommended to the Flourish programme by a friend who was also on it. Teri joined because, feeling stuck and overwhelmed made her feel like she had very few real choices...

“I was thinking, ‘This is it!’ I couldn't see a way out. And over a long period of time, I had gradually lost self-confidence in my abilities and had lost my sense of self.”

What appealed to Teri about the programme was the combination of the coaching, teaching, practising and sharing - knowing that others in the programme felt the same way, regardless of their professions or business. But change can sometimes be uncomfortable and first, Teri had to overcome her initial concerns about the workshops...

“I’m a private person and found my first workshop challenging because when it’s virtual [on Zoom] you have no escape! You have to share. I felt ‘Oh my gosh, do I really have to say something about myself?’ But it became easier. And it was uplifting because I felt listened to. And we could help each other. And it could make it a significant difference.”

She also appreciated the accountability to others that came with the Flourish coaching and workshops...

“Being accountable to Lorna meant that I avoided procrastination and it helped me focus on doing what is essential, avoiding the unnecessary and also avoiding perfectionism.”

Teri says she experienced so many ‘Aha!’ moments during the Flourish programme, but if she was to put her finger on the most impactful learning it was understanding more about her core values.

“Knowing what my core values are and understanding that I can satisfy them in any area of my life; that was mind blowing to me. Because I had been looking for them in work, where they had been unfulfilled, and it was a major frustration. There was a whole shift in mindset. That was so freeing, so liberating; a re-learning of who I actually am.”

There are many tools in the Flourish kit bag to improve confidence and now Teri has a several favourites that she likes to use regularly.

“My confidence anchor is particularly amazing for me. It instantly makes me think, ‘OK, you can do this, you can do this!’ And whatever I’m facing becomes not nearly as challenging as things I’ve done in the past.”

In fact, one technique Teri learnt to reduce her anxiety was so effective she no longer needs to use it, but she knows what to do if she does. And she has less reason to feel anxious about dealing with feedback...

“I used to have a bad emotional reaction to feedback, I would get defensive, but now I can explore what’s really being said and calmly question what’s really useful for me and stay polite and professional with the person giving me the feedback.”

Teri found that in relearning who she is, recognising her strengths and regaining her confidence, many of the other things that had become problematic for her fell away...

“I don’t need approval or recognition or proof from others that I am doing good work. I can recognise that for myself. And, now, doing good work doesn’t mean I have to do things perfectly; I do still take pride in what I do but it’s about doing things well enough to get the job done. I don't consider ‘perfectionist’ to be a word that I would use to describe myself. I’ve got so much time back!”

To sum up, Teri says:

“I am so glad I joined the Flourish programme; it is absolutely worth the investment in time and money.
You always get told you've got choices but knowing that you've actually got a choice, and not an obligation-with-guilt-attached-if-you-don’t-do-it, is amazing!
I have completely refocused, understand who I am again and how I can achieve personal fulfilment in the right places. It has completely changed my outlook on life and the things that I do. I thought I was looking for more control, but in the end, I have the confidence to let go.”

To find out more about how Lorna Thomas / Be The Best You In Business coaching and mentoring could support you to increase your confidence and grow your business with clarity, focus and control, book a call...


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