Despite being what others might consider a high achiever, Sonia felt she should be achieving more. She lacked confidence in her own convictions, she compared herself unfavourably to others and, finding herself wanting, was unable to take as much satisfaction from her own accomplishments as she was entitled to.
“In a coaching session I was talking about not having enough confidence in myself, despite the fact that I've done this, that and the other with my life, because everyone else is doing more. And Lorna asked, “Why do you think everyone else is doing everything else?” And the seed was planted. And I now challenge that all the time. Of course, everyone isn't doing everything! And I'm not the one left behind.”
The combination of coaching, group workshops and journaling initially helped Sonia explore her positive and negative motivators and then challenge her negative beliefs.
“I now consider the validity of my own feelings which has helped me develop and take away the sense of obligation - ‘I should do this’ - and that has been most helpful.”
A combination of approaches and tools, as well as live group practise helped Sonia implement her new habits and behaviours and build her confidence.
“I now regularly check in with myself, particularly when it comes to big decision making, identifying motivations and challenging negative beliefs… and when it comes to my work-related values, I have them on my desk so I can look at them on a regular basis and be a bit more thoughtful of them in my interactions at work.”
Sonia was new to Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP) techniques, which Lorna uses as appropriate to specific client’s needs, and she found her introduction to it interesting and helpful.
“! especially loved Lorna's approach because she was objective and open minded so NLP seemed like it was something that I could have a go at… it was helpful in dialing down my discomfort. The techniques made me think without forcing me too hard. And it really has already made a difference in my interactions with colleagues.”
Many of the techniques that Sonia learnt on the programme have become embedded and the benefits continue to pleasantly surprise her…
“One of the NLP techniques that Lorna taught me was specifically about dealing with anxiety in presentations or being on show. And I remember her saying that she doesn't get nervous about anything now because of this technique. And I just thought, I don't believe that! That’s surely not possible! But I actually I feel that myself now as I have practised the technique to dial down any kind of emotional discomfort and I was really surprised recently at some interviews that I didn't even have to think about it!”
I have changed my client's name to protect her anonymity, but this is her real story and I have quoted her actual words. My sincere thanks to 'Sonia' for generously allowing me to share her experience in this way.
To find out more about how Lorna Thomas / Be The Best You In Business coaching and mentoring could support you to increase your confidence and grow your business with clarity, focus and control, book a call...